Emerging Women

By Julie Clawson

Jim Henderson of Off the Map is working on a book on how the church treats women. As part of his research he commissioned the Barna Group to conduct a survey of women’s experiences in the church. They (Barna Group) spoke with 603 women who met the following qualifications: 18 years or older, described themselves as “Christian” And had attended a Christian church service at least once during the past six months. Among those women, 63% met the survey criteria for being a “Born Again Christian.”

Here’s a bit of what the survey discovered –

1. 84% say that their church’s perspective on women in ministry is almost identical, very similar, or somewhat similar to their own.
2. 83% say that their Senior Pastor is somewhat, highly or completely supportive of women leading in their church
3. 82% say they can tell by their church’s actions that the church values the leadership of women
4. 81% say that their church provides women with the same degree of leadership opportunities as Jesus would.
5. 72% say they possess a lot of spiritual freedom in their life
6. 70% say that the media has little influence on their decision-making
7. 71% say fear is not something they experience ever or often in their life
8. 62% say that ALL leadership roles are open to them in their church.
9. Only 1% say they often struggle with jealousy
10. Among those who feel they are capable of doing more to serve God, and should be doing more, only 4% say that their fear of failure is holding them back from doing more to serve God.

Jim admits that these results seem almost unnaturally positive and asked for other women to comment if these results actually represent their own experience. Here’s what a few Emerging Women wrote on their own blogs concerning the results -

Pam Hogeweide responded -

When I first saw these stats, I had to reread them three times just to make sure I was understanding the data. It then became apparent to me: if a woman in church believes she is only meant to serve and lead other women or children, then yes, of course she is content within her church experience. If today’s Christian woman is convinced by the men in power who teach her that she is to remain dutifully in her biblically mandated role, then this is the perception she will report from.

To answer Jim’s question for myself, No, these stats do not match my experience, nor the experience of many, many women on the road of faith I have known for the last 28 years.

Kathy Escobar commented as well –

once i look up and out at the reality of women in the typical evangelical-y church system i get really, really sad. and really, really mad. when i read these statistics i honestly thought it was a joke. they are not representative of the majority of women that i know and their experiences. but then i remembered that most of the women i hang out with on a regular basis are, on the whole, no longer drinking the christian company kool-aid.
what do i mean by the company kool-aid?

i mean the things that the system tell us to believe. the things that leaders engrain into the community’s culture. the things that are backed up with “we’re 100% certain this is what God meant.” the subtle and direct messages that “good christians believe this.” the herd mentality that is so strong in any homogenous culture–this is the direction everyone’s going so i better tow the line and walk this way, talk this way, too.

And Sonja writes –

It made me angry to read these statistics. It made me angry, not just for the women … but for all the people involved in those churches. They are losing out. This is not the Kingdom of Heaven that Jesus talked about in the Sermon on the Mount, or as he walked with his disciples or at any time. Would even Peter, or John the beloved disciple be able to answer these questions so affirmatively? How about Mary Magdalene? Good grief, if even the disciples struggled with jealousy why on earth can only 6 women out 603 acknowledge it? Perhaps it was the word, often, that threw them off. Maybe they decided that they could deny that jealousy was something that strolled in and regularly did battle in their hearts. I know I will stand up and say that I am jealous all the time. It doesn’t make me mean anymore, but acknowledging it to myself and being able to laugh at it has made it easier.

Then this report made me sad. The kind of sad that aches in my bones. Because when I look at it I see poverty. The church in North America (like the US) may have a lot of money. It may have a lot of stuff. We may also have a lot of people for all I know. But we are starving to death. Emaciated and dying for lack of food, water and oxygen. Worse, we are doing it to ourselves. With a huge smile on our faces. We are a people with anorexia or bulimia. When we look in the mirror we see fat and happy, but the reality is we are starving. Dying.

In all truth I lost my faith in the Barna Group’s ability to conduct meaningful surveys years ago. The way they ask their questions, and especially who they ask them of, doesn’t exactly represent reality as I know it. But I get that for women in churches that tell them that “1. Women must not lead in the church, 2. To question that is to question the Bible, and 3. That to question the Bible (or admit there might be different interpretations) is a slippery-slope into unchristian liberalism” OF COURSE they are going to say that they are in agreement with their church’s confining views of women. I bought that lie hook, line, and sinker for years, I know that world.

So like the other women have expressed, these survey results sadden me. They do represent a segment of the church – one where patriarchy rules disguised in biblical clothing. These women don’t have the freedom to question their position without fear of being mocked or excluded from their fellowship. They don’t even have the freedom to admit they experience fear or jealousy (what sort of sick repression is going on here in our image first church world????) They don’t believe that they are allowed to be happy in any other setting. I get that that part of the church exists. But it’s not my experience anymore. Maybe the women who have escaped that world might not fall into Barna’s strict definition of Christian (didn’t a few years ago they define a Christian as one who believes in the Bible’s inerrancy?) I don’t know, I just know that some of these results are disturbing on a deep and visceral level. There is much we can learn from the results, and I am eager to read Jim’s response in his book. But I also think there is a real danger of these statistics being grievously misused in defense of the continued oppression of women and the silencing of half the church. I pray that is not the case.

By Kathy Escobar

there’s nothing like writing a wrap up of an event 3 months after it happened! that’s what sometimes happens in my crazy life, but i didn’t want to miss the opportunity to share a bit of what i gleaned from a great time together at convergence 2009 (http://womensconvergence.com/) , a gathering of women leaders in portland in february, so that women who weren’t able to be there could catch a bit of what was shared.

on saturday there was a panel discussion that included a variety of voices that the participants chose with questions that they had written down earlier in the day. i had the privilege of being part of the panel & some of the thoughts from that segment are the tangible ones that might encourage other women leaders on their journeys.

here are a few highlights of statements & thoughts shared by the panelists (sorry, i didn’t keep track of who said what) that i wrote down afterward & have been reflecting on in different ways for the the past few months:

• “know our limitations” – this a big one for so many of us. many of us struggle with wanting to be all
things for all people. and because so many are capable and have incredible gifts, it is quite possible to give more than we probably should. it is important to cultivate a clear sense of what we can and can’t do, recognizing that some that we serve & love will not understand. it’s not our job to make others see; it is our job to create balance in our lives as best we can; that will most certainly mean acknowledging & recognizing our limits.

• “cultivate friendships with other women leaders so we can learn from each other.” i always hesitate to use the word mentor here because i know many of us (especially in the evangelical tradition where there aren’t as many women pastors in general) have been in leadership a long time without any true “mentors” that have invested specific time and energy in cultivating our gifts and supporting us on the journey. of course, many women have had these kinds of relationships, and i am glad some have received that support. for me, i think the most encouraging part of the past few years has been intentionally cultivating relationships with other women pastors/leaders/writers/pot-stirrers and really sharing life & experiences together. it has made a world of difference. one thing many of us have shared in different ways is how frustrated we’ve been in the spirit of competitiveness that often exists among women. i am not sure what that’s all about (i am guessing insecurity?) but i think that we need to really notice what kind of vibe we are putting off and be more confident in our roles, who we are, and love each other more intentionally. we are all busy, but making time for these kinds of challenging & encouraging relationships is so important.

• “make room for other women & voices as much as we can.” we have a responsibility to each other. the only way to keep hearing from a variety of different voices, no matter what that looks like, is for people with power to give it away. whoever has the microphone, the floor, the leadership usually has some form of power. the more we pass that microphone we have to our other sisters, encourage them to step up & use their voices, the better. and because we know what it might feel to be marginalized, we can use our leadership to include as many other new voices as possible—across gender, race, socioeconomics, and all kinds of other lines.

• “be who we are; don’t try to be something we’re not.” each of us is unique and bring different gifts and combinations of personalities and strengths and weaknesses to the table. we are supposed to be “us”, not who we think other want us to be or what we think we are supposed to be because of what kind of authors, speakers, whoever we see. it’s true, many of us will not make a ton of money or get some crazy book deal or a whole lot of other things, but hopefully we will honor who God made us to be and live as integrated and whole and honest as possible.

• “learn to be friends with men.” the question came up about our sexuality & how it can be a limitation if we are not in touch with it. there’s no doubt that much healing and restoration must happen between genders to learn to live and work and be together as equals, taking sex & power out of the equation. we have a responsibility as leaders to work on this, to change unhealthy patterns, to become more free in our ability to engage with men as friends, co-laborers, equals.

• “take good care of ourselves.” ah, self care. the demands of ministry, family, kids, work, and all of the other pulls on us can really take its toll. we all want to last. we want to live out who God created us to be. we don’t want to burn out. we want to take good care of our families. we want to live a balanced life that includes a lot of other things other than just leading. in order to do this, we need to work on taking care of ourselves emotionally, physically, spiritually.

• “accept the reality of injustice but do everything we can to fight against it.” the reality is that injustice against women in the church in many denominations is present. it’s real, it’s not going away anytime soon. living with this injustice is sometimes so hard; it can make us want to give up and throw in the towel or stop fighting for change. part of our roles as women in leadership is to live in the tension of what is and what could be and be bridge builders, risk takers, path pavers toward healing of injustice on behalf of the women who will come behind us. our daughters need us. our sisters need us. we may not see all of the fruit of our labors, but the work we are doing now plant seeds has the potential to grow incredible fruit in the future. let’s keep our eyes on them & not give up.
there were many other things shared in our time together, but these are the ones who have lingered. no doubt, there was incredible wisdom in the room. these tiny highlights won’t give it justice, but hopefully a little of what happened there is spread across the miles to encourage others, too.

kathy escobar co-pastors the refuge (www.therefugeonline.org), an eclectic faith community in north denver dedicated to those on the margins. she also is the cultivator of voca femina (www.vocafemina.com), new site for women to use their voices through art, writing, photography, and other mediums.